- Tsilechka, dear, what's for dinner?

- Very lazy cabbage rolls.

- What is it?

- Cabbage on a loggia, minced meat in the freezer.

***


Jew from Berdichev came to Odessa, hired a cab and asked to drop off Deribasovskaya.

- Sit down! - cabby said.

He sat down, they went. Suddenly the cab driver says:

- Get off!

-?

- You see, the road went up! We should support the wagon - suddenly the horse will not stand.

Peeled. Dragged the wagon up the mountain. The passenger got only drove about a hundred meters, trooper says:

- Get off! You see, the road went steeply down ...

Tears. Supported. Later. Passenger villages. We drove about a hundred meters. Cab:

- Get off!

-?

- Here we are!

Passenger:

- I understand why I took you - would like to get. I understand why you would take me - I wanted to make. But why should we take the horse?

***


Kupershmidt Friday evening found in Przemysl with relatives, and he was invited to dinner. On the table is a dish with a wonderful jellied carp. The relatives asked a guest:

- what are you doing mom 3osya?

- She died - he meets Kupershmidt and while women weep and the men shake their heads sadly, takes a huge chunk of carp with the middle.

And on the table, meanwhile, are served stuffed goose with dumplings. Ladies have calmed down a bit and ask:

- And how are you dad Yossi?

- Drowned - said Kupershmidt. Ladies again begin to cry, and goose moved piece by piece on a plate Kupershmidt.

Make apple strudel with a crispy crust.

- what are you doing Yoshino mother-in-law? - interested ladies.

- died from senile dementia, - says Kupershmidt and taken for strudel.

This time he comes up against an objection. One of the guests interfere in the conversation:

- You are wrong! I just yesterday saw this lady on the boardwalk in Carlsbad healthy and vigorous.

- Maybe - is responsible Kupershmidt indifferent - when I eat the rest for me - dead.

***


This story actually occurred at the beginning of World War II in one of London's recruiting station. Jewish refugee from Germany decided to volunteer for the army.

- What's your name? - asks his English colonel.

- William Adolph Deutsch.

- You probably exaggerating a bit?